Wednesday, May 8, 2013

The Phil Jackson Of English Soccer, Sir Alex Ferguson, Is Retiring. Seriously, Though, He Might Be Phil Jackson’s Non-Evil Scottish Twin.

The Scot, 71, has won 38 trophies during his reign at Old Trafford and will now become a director and ambassador for the club. His haul includes 13 league titles, two Champions League crowns, five FA Cups and four League Cups.

This is a massive deal in England, and all around the non-soccer-hating world, which is nearly the entire world. Ferguson will be missed, and because he is Phil Jackson's non-evil, European twin, he will probably remain retired for good, and we will not have to hear rumors about him going to Bayern Munich or Real Madrid or the Brooklyn Nets anytime soon.

Phil Jackson is four years younger, two titles behind and a few retirements ahead, but he basically is Sir Alex Ferguson, minus the fact that a "Sir Alex Ferguson weed" google search turns up absolutely nothing.

Marcel Mutoni RT @russbengtson: So they'll present George Karl with the COY trophy before the Nuggets' next playoff game, right?

Peter King My apologies for the sexist Tweet about the Sunday night football Emmy congrats. Not just men on the crew, obviously. Well-deserved, all.

Holly MacKenzie RT @michaelgrange: My column on the #Raptors Bryan Colangelo winning the fight of his professional life: http://t.co/rALY6g1JR2

More Info: Ancelotti: "Still have not taken a decision about my future"

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